Was in a discussion today that got me thinking I wanted to address this in my blog. The topic of that post asked about monogamy...and questions if we humans are actually "wired" for monogamy. I immediately had to respond that it depends on which "self" the person operates is...the physical or the spiritual. Most faiths and religions recognize that there are these two selves, so to speak, with our physical body merely being containers for a spirit or energy that we may never really understand, but we can get a glimpse of.
In answer to the original question, I pointed out that those who operate in their physical selves, are more likely to not be "wired" for monogamy. The reason for this being, that they want physical connection, view people physically, and let's face it, the physical really lacks a conscience, as the conscience is part of one's spiritual self. If you silence the conscience, you can basically do whatever you want, right?
On the other hand, those who operate in the spiritual self are more open to monogamy. This is because they long for deep connection of energies, and this can only truly be accomplished when you spend some amount of time with a person. When a person operates in their spiritual self, they tend to not see their mate or potential mate for their physical attributes, but they are looking for their Aura, and not just any will do! The other person's energy has to meld well with your own...like two magnets. If you turn magnets one way, they attract each other, but turn them a different way, and it produces a different energy that repels.
Personally, I operate in my spiritual self. I want that long term commitment to one person! I want to take the time to get past all the awkwardness of initial encounters...the point where you are figuring out what each other likes and doesn't like. I crave the point in the relationship where you can just enjoy each other, and connect at that intimate spiritual level...not worried that you ate too much and your belly is a little bloated, or what position is most comfortable for the both of you...where you can just forget that your physical body is there, and truly enjoy each other! I find that once I get to that point with a person, I really don't see anyone else...like our energies are constantly connected, and even when we aren't together, I can still feel them there, and I never feel alone. I know it sounds crazy, but those who operate in this self know exactly what I'm talking about.
On the other hand, my ex very much operated in the physical self. How did I know this? My first clue was how he would comment about my appearance. For example, always bringing up that my boobs were small, and how nice it would be if I got a boob job! Now, had he operated in the spiritual, he wouldn't have even noticed, because that is not what he would be seeing! Those who operate in the physical are also more prone to cheating...which he did 3 times during the marriage. They do this to satisfy the physical self, and it isn't always because they aren't getting enough at home. No...quite the contrary! See, the physical self CRAVES attention and physical satisfaction. These are the people who are more likely to become addicts of some sort...especially sex addicts! They see a physically attractive person walking down the street, and they will ALWAYS notice! Because they aren't in check by their conscience as much, they may even be crude about it!
You also see this difference just in general life...not just in intimate relationships. If a person is racist, is prone to body shame someone, etc., chances are very high that they operate in the physical self, because when they look at a person they see appearance FIRST! Skin color, gender, body shape. On the other hand, a person operating in their spiritual self will see their aura, or energies, first. These are the people who you usually find saying things like, "I don't know what it is! There is just SOMETHING about that person I don't like...that gives me the heebies!" In general, they tend to be more loving and compassionate, and are probably more likely to be LGBT, because they fall in love with someone because of their energy, not because of their gender...and they look at people seeing their energy before they see the physical at all! I'm not saying all LGBT operate in their spiritual selves, but it is probably a contributing factor. Personally, I have found my LGBT friends to be the most real and compassionate people I know, which leads me to believe that many do operate in the spiritual self!
Can one change from which self they operate? Well, considering both exist, YES! I mean, is that part of what "enlightenment" is? Realizing that you are far more than your physical self, and operating more in the spiritual? And it is very possible for one to go the other way, too. Maybe they have been hurt so many times that they close themselves off, and thus believe that the physical self can't be hurt as deeply!
Just some stuff to ponder....